Karla's Stance Part 3

Howdy, Cowboys & Cowgirls:D Okay, so maybe not everyone that reads this blog are cowboys or cowgirls...ya don't know what yer missin':P I can honestly say I enjoy my cowgirl boots a little too much because 99% of the time that's what I wear and when I am not I am bare foot, thankfully. At home I'd rather not wear anything on my feet period! The feel of the straw beneath my feet or the grass mowed or not mowed....ahhhh, now that's what I am talkin' about!!!! Yes, there's nothing like it:) I tried to get my Pa to go barefoot while working outside and let's just say he doesn't plan on doing that again. *smiles and laughs* I am not sure why he has problems when he goes barefoot. My brother has decided to follow me in going barefoot out in the garden:) It's okay to have dirty, calloused/cracked heels right? Okay, so some of you who(probably citified...I live in the city but would rather be in the country) are reading this are probably thinkin' I am crazy but does that mean I care...NOPE!!! Hehe.

Okay, enough of my babbling/talking of nothing important...no I am not a babbling crazymatic. Seriously, though I will get right to the point and get to writing more of my stance on where I stand in my beliefs.


5. Betrothal

Well, from what I can see in Scripture(The Authorized King James Bible) by taking into consideration the principles, pictures, patterns, and commandments in the Bible that I see principles, pictures, and patterns of how things were done pertaining to "finding" a spouse.
You never see any dating/courtship in the Bible. What I mean is that many forms of courtship do not totally resemble betrothal in the Bible. Alot of times they start courting and pray while courting to see if it is God's will which is like dating really except you may not touch one another and you may have chaperones. I have seen people hurt through this many a times. In fact, I at one time was in contact with a guy who was 3 years older than me and he had listened to the Betrothal series by S.M. Davis...boy was I wrong about that guy! He really just believed in courtship not betrothal but I never figured it out until later. I kept saying what I believed but it went through one ear and out the other. We really had issues. Thankfully, I never got engaged to him...boy, I would of been miserable! There were warning signs along the way that (My Dad had warning signals going off in his head)I had ignored till the end and it was God working and God took care of that. What a burden it had been! I figure now that I am not really willing to settle for anything less than God's best and that includes how things are done. I won't compromise my convictions just so I can get married. NOPE! I'd rather be an unmarried woman than to go through heartbreak all over again. I want everything to be as pure and holy as it can be.

Anyways, back to what I was saying. You don't see any of God's people in the Bible going around dating around for the thrill of it or for a spouse do you? Do you see them starting a courtship with the intention to see if it's God's will? Here's what we see if we are paying attention. Abraham's servant goes to the well and prays to Abraham's God(Jehovah) and he says,

"And he said, O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and shew kindness unto my master Abraham.
Behold, I stand [here] by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water:
And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: [let the same be] she [that] thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast shewed kindness unto my master.
And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that, behold, Rebekah came out, who was born to Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, with her pitcher upon her shoulder.
And the damsel [was] very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.
And the servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher.
And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and gave him drink.
And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw [water] for thy camels also, until they have done drinking.
And she hasted, and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw [water], and drew for all his camels.
And the man wondering at her held his peace, to wit whether the LORD had made his journey prosperous or not.
And it came to pass, as the camels had done drinking, that the man took a golden earring of half a shekel weight, and two bracelets for her hands of ten [shekels] weight of gold;
And said, Whose daughter [art] thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room [in] thy father's house for us to lodge in?
And she said unto him, I [am] the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor.
She said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in.
And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the LORD
And he said, Blessed [be] the LORD God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth: I [being] in the way, the LORD led me to the house of my master's brethren.
And the damsel ran, and told [them of] her mother's house these things.

Okay, so from there her brother, Laban comes out and speaks to him. He invites him to lodge for the night at the home. They put food on front of him and he said he couldn't eat till his errand was heard. So, the servant recounts everything and Laban and Bethuel were amazed and they couldn't deny that it was God that had his hand in everything. So, they did not object. But, they did ask Rebekah and she was willing. So, you see that betrothal isn't something forced upon the young woman nor is it necessarily arranged my parents or family members. There is no dating or courting before hand. When Rebekah said yes that was it. SHe was betrothed and she was going to be married to this wonderful Isaac.

Betrothed is what we are to Christ when we accept his offer of salvation. Betrothal is very similar to the picture of Christ and him seeking a bride. That person can accept or reject that offer.

Betrothal in the Bible went something like this: the man goes to the parents or his parents(spiritual parents/mentor or whoever is older and acts on his behalf in place of his parents) speak to the young lady's father or both parents. But, the young man has already prayed and knows for a fact that the young lady is the one that God would have him marry. That she is to be his help meet. The father then prays about it to see if it truly is God's will. If God shows him that indeed the young man is for his daughter then he consents and says that he may ask his daughter for her hand in marriage. The daughter can refuse or pray about it first then give an answer or if she already knows that it's God's will she can right away simply accept his proposal.
In the Bible we see that not all loved each other before the proposal nor did they always know each other very well or at all. The young man or his family may know of the family or know the dad personally. The young man never speaks of marriage or anything of the like to the young lady until permission has been granted to him to do that. If they have never met or spoke to each other that's fine. I know fo a married couple who grew up around each other. The young man onc ehe knew it was God's will he spoke to her father and they knew he was the one. So, they didn't tell her right away that they were taking her to see him until they were on their way and they told her why they were going. When he got there they shared their testimonies again with each other and he told her how the Lord was working in him and he said he understood if she needed time. She told him how the Lord had been working in her and what she had prayed concerning him and that God had answered it. So, she proceeded to accept his proposal.

Then there are people who have known or been around each other for two weeks and have known it was God's will. Some who have never met the person but the Lord impresses upon them that it's God's will.

Anyway, love comes after the betrothal slowly but steady. During the entire time they do not have any physical contact as in holding hands or any other forms of touching(1 Corinthians says it is good for a man not to touch a woman). Touching is something to be enjoyed in marriage only. Because we are all flesh and one thing leads to another. Never trust the flesh. We also see in the Bible that Joseph and Mary were betrothed a year then married. Well, it is good not to go beyond a year period! But, my Dad and I both agree the shorter a betrothal the better. Because emotions ride high and it is hard on both sides of the fence. My Dad and I both agree no more than four months.